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Say You Are Sorry with a Gift
Children grow up learning that "please" is the magic word, but as adults we sometimes need to be reminded that "sorry" is another. It's often tough to say, but no sentiment is more powerful in keeping families together through life's spats, misunderstandings and occasional major feuds. A gift may be able to help you say that you are sorry. A gift can send a powerful message.
Using the right words . . .
Let's say you said something unfortunate to your mother-in-law. Fortunately words have the power to heal as well as hurt. Try writing-lest you stick your foot in your mouth again-and keep your apology simple. Include a small thoughtful gift. What you should not say is "I'm sorry that you were hurt". To say you're sorry using these words doesn't do any good; it absolves you of blame and sounds halfhearted. Instead, by saying, "I'm sorry for what I said-it was awful," or "I was wrong and I sincerely apologize," you accept responsibility and show you regret your actions. A small thoughtful gift again may be able to help.
Here is another example. Let's say that a lifestyle disagreement drove you and someone who you were once close with apart. Maybe geography or busy lives simply got in the way. Whatever the cause, you're no longer in each other's life, and now you regret it. A nice first step would be to simply say "All I can think about is losing our relationship. Please, let's forget it. It's my fault." In this case it is important to accept some of the blame. Could a small thoughtful gift help in this situation - you can determine if it will help. Whatever you do don't rehash the situation. This risks stirring it up again.
These are some thoughts on using a gift to patch things up. A gift can help but be sure to use words and to deliver them properly.

 

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